Category Archives: trust

From Control to Trust by Michelle Kunz

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When we talk about leadership, the word “results” almost always enters the conversation. This is natural because we were trained to view leadership as a results-oriented set of skills. We take that view and we paste it onto teamwork and organizational development and everything else that we touch, rather like King Midas and his love of gold. We love results and we want to surround ourselves with the tools to achieve more and more results. As many results as we can gather in our arms and as high a pile as we can reach on tip-toe.

Does this sound selfish and greedy? It is. It is a selfish way to lead. When we lead from results, we force everyone, including ourselves, to become outwardly driven. We work from the end backwards, and we become controlling because we have this one goal in mind that we must achieve at all costs. We become controlling because we view ourselves, the leaders, as totally responsible for the success or failure of achieving the goal, never mind how many others may contribute.

On the other hand, when we lead from synergy – appreciating and harnessing what we each bring to the process that is uniquely ours to bring, what we contribute as a group, how what we contribute impacts the client, the world, the team, ourselves, and why we are doing it to begin with – we begin to open ourselves to trust. We trust the process and each other, our team and their innate knowledge and skills, and most importantly, ourselves.

One of the most important skills a powerful leader can develop is the ability to live in the moment of synergy while keeping a detached eye on the goal. We can engage fully in the process while checking to see that we remain on target. This is very different from driving the process from the target backward.

Here can you let go of results and trust in the process a little more with your team? How can you lead from synergy rather than control this week?

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Lead Me to Lead You by Michelle Kunz

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Leaders don’t create followers, they create more leaders. — Tom Peters

I’ve got to follow them – I am their leader. – Alexandre Rollin

Barbara Kellerman of Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government is on fire about followers. She believes that over-emphasizing leadership at the expense of overlooking those we lead can result in dramatic failure. Because there has been such huge growth in recent years in the leadership growth industry, she is now speaking out on behalf of followers, and has even written a book on the subject: Followership, released this weekend.

It is not only refreshing, it is important that such a book has been written, not only for followers, but for leaders. Learning to identify the kinds of followers we have on our team (Ms. Kellerman identifies five general types) can help us learn how to engage with them, listen to them, motivate them and ultimately learn which are the truly essential and trustworthy members of our teams.

As leaders, we would prefer that all our team members become essential, valuable players. But experience tells us that this is often not the case and we need to know how to manage the situation when faced with an employee who is simply punching a time clock or worse, subtly sabotaging our best efforts or those of other team members. We often spend far too much time trying to convert these people into raving fans, when perhaps that is not the model they are working from and all our energy and activity is for naught unless we figure that out before making big investments.

Learning from those we lead

Gathering feedback is one of many ways we can learn from those we lead. There are many good ways to do this and many fairly ineffective ways. High level leaders with very good intentions often miss the mark when trying to assess what is going on down in the trenches. Why? Because they don’t get down in the trenches to find out. Instead, they resort to impersonal surveys, assessments and other data gathering tools which aggregate information. This can be useful if we are looking for trends, but if we really want to know what people think, what they are doing, what they think should be done differently and so on, nothing beats face to face conversation on their turf.

Some of the greatest leaders in history were known and are known for their ability to get down and dirty with their followers. Not only does this promote a greater sense of loyalty because of the personal connections forged, it allows the leader the opportunity to walk in the followers’ shoes and experience things from their perspective. When we do this, the world shifts and so does our thinking. We become more open to new ideas, more accessible, more human, more fun, more real. And our ability to see what works over here and not over there, why these people need this and those people need that, why this particular person does it this way and that person does it that way increases dramatically.

Creating more leaders

The ability to empower those we lead so that there is no clear line of demarcation between us and them when we are working together on a project is the mark of a great leader. I’m not suggesting that we abdicate all decision making or responsibility. The more we engage with our teams in actual work, the more we understand what their lives are like, the more they come to know us and we them, and the greater the trust and loyalty we build between us. As a result, when they make suggestions, we are more likely to listen, and when we make requests, so are they.

By contrast, leaders who foster environments where decisions constantly need final approval, strict controls must be followed for the sake of control itself, and workers feel stymied by rules, culture, personalities, or chaos create greater hierarchical dependency (perhaps) but disempower their teams. This leads to greater turn-over, lower efficiency and efficacy, lower productivity and ultimately lower overall success for the organization.

As uncomfortable as it may make some leaders, it cannot be denied that in most cases a strict, hierarchical leadership model no longer makes sense for most organizations. Teaching, coaching, mentoring and leading others to lead themselves and others is ultimately more satisfying and more productive for all involved.

The characteristics of humility, honesty, authenticity, patience, integrity, trustworthiness and compassion, among others are critically important to this process. A great degree of self-awareness and desire for greater levels of conscious choice also largely determine the degree of success one can expect to attain when letting go and letting others lead.

Powerful leaders embrace the challenge. They willingly step into the shoes of the follower when appropriate, open to all that may be observed and shaped into future opportunity. The flexibility to move from leader to follower and back becomes a pleasurable stretch because with every new experience something new is brought forward for the benefit of all. Embrace your flexibility and find a new situation in which you can exercise that opportunity for growth.

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Are You Self-Motivated, Going-Through-the-Motions, or Tuned-Out? by Michelle Kunz

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In an article on engagement (“Engage me or enrage me”, Management Issues, 26 Sep 2006), Max McKeown describes three possible types of students and the three possible types of employees they may become: self-motivated, going-through-the-motions or tuned-out. These types develop as a result of the education system failing to fully engage a student, followed by their employment experience failing to fully engage them. This post does not intend to address the issues of the education system nor describe the three types and how to diagnose them. The reason I bring this to your attention is that as a leader, you are going to have these types on your team. And you, yourself, are also most likely one of these types.

In a series of separate articles Management Issues addresses a host of topics related to employee engagement. Among them is the article “The keys to employee engagement” (February 2007) in which a UK poll of 100,000 employees suggests that managers who lead by example, listen to their employees and engage in life long learning are most likely to engage employees. Let me paint this a little more clearly for those of you who may be feeling lost. The self-motivated employees are your smallest problem. If you have any hope of engaging the going-through-the-motion and the tuned-out types, you are going to have to step up to the plate and engage yourself first.

Leading by example

If we are to lead by example, we must first take an honest, no-holds-barred look at ourselves and see where we stand. If it is possible that our employees fall into one of three categories (self-motivated, going-through-the-motions, or tuned-out), then we must assess ourselves and see where we fall as well. To lead others, we must be able to lead ourselves. We must be able to walk the talk. This is because there is no leadership without trust. Trust requires vulnerability. And vulnerability requires that we can readily and freely admit our strengths AND our weaknesses. What we know and what we don’t. Where we are confident and where we need help. How can we expect our team to do what we ourselves are unwilling to do?

Leadership is an ongoing study in self growth. There is no way you can lead from a going-through-the-motions or a tuned-out position. We must get to a place of self motivation. This is sometimes simply a matter of hard work and discipline. Just when you think you’ve conquered your last experience with boredom and apathy, a day comes when the work facing you for the next eight hours seems less aligned with your internal fire and vision than you had hoped. The true test of self motivation arrives at that moment in the shape of: What do you do under those circumstances?

There are thousands of books written to tell you how to keep positive thoughts going, how to write out your goals and keep them in front of you to inspire you, how to prioritize and organize your time and tasks. And there are some people for whom those systems work very, very well. But what about those for whom the systems occasionally or perhaps even often don’t work? Is this an indication that they are less self-motivated? By definition, I argue that this means that in fact, no, they are not less self-motivated. For the first group, it is the goal, the positive thoughts, the system which is keeping them going — and as long as that works, they should keep doing it! But what if you are struggling to get motivated by goals, positive thoughts and systems?

Tapping into your values and principles

Some people are strongly motivated by a set of deeply held inner values and core principles by which their entire worlds are organized. When a project or even a small chore or task aligns with those values, they experience a sense of urgency and excitement which carries them through the action required. It doesn’t feel like work at all, and the time flies. If a given project or task does not seem to align with those core values, it is extremely difficult to see the point in doing it. It feels like a waste of time, and the time drags by.

The truth is, all of us have these core values and principles. We simply are not always aware of what they are. We have never stopped to give it any thought. If I were to ask you to define and rank your top five values, you might have a very difficult time coming up with a list. You might easily come up with twenty values you think should have equal importance, or you might struggle to come up with three. Either experience is simply an indication that you have not had the opportunity to think in these terms before.

As a powerful leader, it is essential to know clearly and without hesitation what your defining values are. When you have clarified this for yourself, you will become aware of which activities align with your values and which do not. And several options will become available to you. You can delegate a certain task to someone else who might have better alignment with the task; you can re-frame the task; or you can simply say no and seek tasks which are in better alignment with your values.

Furthermore, once you have clarity around values and principles, any set of goals, positive thoughts and external systems will have more value for you because you will ensure that whatever you are working with, it aligns with some deeper meaning. This creates a powerful synergy within you that allows the outer stuff (the goals, ideas, etc.) to have much more purpose. You will experience greater buy-in to your own plans.

Listening deeply to those we lead

Whether it is our children, someone we serve as a volunteer, or our employees, learning to listen deeply is essential in mastering the art of engaging others. The key is to listen to clues as to what the other person’s values and core principles might be. As we have seen, it is here that the essential ingredients — the keys — lie to true motivation.

For example, if someone is struggling with a particular task, we can ask empowering questions. What about the task is challenging? If the answer is anything other than skill related, this is a sign that something is out of alignment for the other person. Resistance in any form is a sign of misalignment. Sometimes we need to dig a little deeper to uncover assumptions or limiting beliefs that are simply in the way of alignment occurring. This can be true if the person we are working with believes that the task isn’t important, that no one cares about their project, that perceptions exist about their role in the company and so on. Our job at that point is to remove the assumptions and limiting beliefs so the person can become realigned with their task.

If the person we are working with begins to talk about not feeling connected to the bigger project or company picture, this is an indication of a larger type of misalignment which may or may not be able to be adjusted. Helping the person articulate their inner values at this point can be very helpful. Questions such as: What are the most important things to you in your life? What do you value the most in life? asked in a safe, confidential context can help the individual and you come to a greater understanding of what kind of work really motivates them. If you can then find a way to connect the work required of them to their motivations, you can help realign them to the task at hand. If not, it is sometimes better for all people involved if the person moves on to something else they are better suited for.

Life long learning

There are many types of learning, and it is easiest to focus on the external acquisition of additional skills. As leaders, who we are is often more important than what we know. To fully maximize our potential in being we need to become skilled in the area of self awareness. Self awareness is a life long process. It is not a course you take on a weekend where you receive a certificate and then you’re done. Of all the learning we can do to become more powerful leaders, self awareness is among the most important. When we seek to lead by example, how else can we truly accomplish that without a deep understanding of what it is we do and why? This applies everywhere — how we listen, how we talk, how we organize our tasks, how we approach problems, how we interact with others — and why. Self awareness does not require years of therapy (in the absence of psychological distress), but it does require an ongoing willingness to look inward and ask questions.

Many of us would prefer to not look within. We are afraid of what we will see and the implications. We’ll have to change everything, and we know that is impossible, so we feel like failures before we ever begin. That approach is filled with assumptions and limiting beliefs. A more curious and gentle approach might serve us better. We aren’t looking to deconstruct every relationship we ever had. We’re looking to get to know ourselves better. What am I really like? What makes my creative and energetic juices flow? What do I like and don’t like? If there were no other people or institutions in the world (i.e., no pressure), what would I choose for this or that? Why am I not choosing that now? If I could have any resource I needed within 24 hours, what would I choose to do within the next 48?

The answers to these questions shed a great deal of light on who we are now and who we might become. Powerful leaders look for potential within as well as without and they know that like the old song “let peace begin with me”, motivation, engagement, excitement, inspiration, all that is good in leadership begins with one person: me.

Are you self-motivated, going-through-the-motions or tuned-out? Regardless of were you are now, you have the ability to make a big shift into the type you choose to be. Choose powerful leadership. Choose leading by example, deep listening and life long learning.